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Temora: Bard of Dubious Talent
"You no lookee...me take 3000 dinars for lookee..."
Silence.
In the misty half light of the morning, the room is bathed in an ethereal sunlight, giving it a gilded feel and I didn't mind too much that it had cost me 3000 dinars to get in here. My guide book - The Rough Guide to the Xenaverse - had made a point of specifying that TEMORA'S house was NOT to be missed.
"You no mind de mess, misses!" The guide's voice cracked the silence, his warning well timed as I tripped over a couple of empty Fosters stubbies and nearly broke my ankle. The Rough Guide hadn't mentioned that. It also hadn't mentioned the peculiar...stench...that hung over the room like a pall. The smell of...
"You pay extra 3000 dinars to see Big Time bard, misses!!"
The eager brown hand was stretched out, grasping my precious cash before I could even think about it. Next thing, the bed blankets were thrown back and... oh, the horror!!!
Sad news, folks. Temora has decided to take a break from Xena fan fiction, and wants to now concentrate on producing original material. Of course, she'd still love to hear from fans, and if you want to write to her about her stories please do, but she will NOT be giving in to any requests to write any more fan fiction.
I will still be updating her site from time to time with reviews, awards and anything else Temora related that may come along...and hopefully she'll agree to post future original work here too (fingers crossed, and wish very hard...) But in the meantime, I'd like to wish the old reprobate the best of luck with her new writing ventures - you just better keep sending 'em along! You know I'm a better beta than Kam - and of course, to say thanks for giving us some of the best fanfiction that has been produced in the Xenaverse.
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Xena:Warrior Princess Fan Fiction |
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The TV show "Xena:Warrior Princess" is the property of Renaissance Productions. All characters and their images used on these pages are copyrighted to Renaissance Productions, and are used purely for entertainment purposes. No money is being made out of these stories.
Copying and storing Temora's stories is fine with her, but she does ask that you always include the disclaimer.
And now...<drum roll>...for your reading pleasure, I give you...from Temora: Bard of Barely Functioning Consciousness Enterprises Inc...
(these are listed in date order, the most recent being at the end...)
Solitaire - alt, drama Violent content. Read the disclaimer. A dark night. Intruders. And a warrior must hunt them down.. |
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The Lady Knows When To Leave - gen, drama Ares offers Gabrielle the chance to be everything she has ever wanted to be in Xena's eyes. Has he finally chosen the right way to win her over? |
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Fighting The Good Fight - subtext, parody Warning: Very sarcastic. In a loving way! Read the disclaimer. What will the bard and warrior do when they are faced with an Evil Warlord and his undersized army? A helpless village full of Kiwi extras? A pantheon of off-camera interference? That's right! It's Xena and Gabrielle's Warlord of the Week! |
Swollen
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Yeah, But With A Really Big Sword - gen, drama After Eve's birth, Xena and Gabrielle are in need of a little down time. The warrior decides that Potadaeia is the perfect place - both to hide from the gods, and to allow a strangely secretive bard to touch base with her family. What she does not reckon on is the fact that the bard no longer feels connected to the town, the people, or her former life. Can Gabrielle work through it in time to decide which family needs her protection most of all? |
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Wish You Were Here - alt, comedy Package tours. Sooner or later they happen to everyone. This is what happens when a thrill-seeking warrior and bard are in all the Right places at all the Wrong times. Complete with postcards home to Ephiny, Joxer, Alti, and everybody else you can think of, too. |
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Shade - alt, drama Warning: contains behaviour that some may find disturbing. Read the disclaimer. Told in first person, this story is about what happens when one lonely soldier fixates on a certain unavailable golden-haired Amazon, unaware of what his own feelings will unleash. |
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GabriSybil - alt, comedy How many personalities can one small bard on her cycle possess? Read this and find out. |
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Initiation - gen, drama A story about the beginnings of violence - in a character you may not expect. |
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Quality Dying Time - subtext, drama When a landslide traps and injures the warrior and bard on the side of a lonely, freezing mountain, their only chance for rescue lies in the hands of a strange nine-year-old girl, Tai. But the problem is, Tai doesn't want to help. Tai wants to talk. And their time is fast running out... |
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This Is A First Time Story - alt, comedy/drama AHA! I hear you say. One of THOSE stories! Well, yes, and no. Sure, it's about their first time, but there were a lot of those. More than you ever imagined...and at least ten of them are in this story. Confused? You won't be if you read it! |
Swollen Bud winner Xenaverse Gold Fanfic Award |
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A Once And Future Journey - alt Post FIN2 story. There be spoilers here! |
Xenalicious review |
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Links...to places. Places on the web. Places that you might know. Places that you might use. Places where Temora might be.
Be afraid...be very afraid...
| A fantastic place to catch reviews and news for any and all genre TV you happen to be addicted to. Read Jeff Lundrigan's Xena reviews! | Invaluable resource - and if you join up, (there's no spam) you can add whatever you want! Imagine! Pages and pages of subtexty quotes from XWP! It could happen... | Read what Temora would do if she had enough time on her hands. I tells ya, it ain't pretty. |
Mail Temora, for pity's sake! Mail her!
And that's it folks. Tour's over. Nothing to see here...move along now....
Ooops! Missed a bit!!
Temora's site was designed & maintained by Evil Designs
Mail Lariel or Temora if you have any comments or suggestions for this site.